Friday, 12 June 2015

10 things to which teachers can bid farewell for the summer

1. Clean versions of swear words: 
Now when you drop something, you don't need to say, "Shi... sugar!"

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2. Early morning alarms:
Early mor... What is this thing of which you speak? Oh yeah, that thing I don't have to do this month... or next month!
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3. PAPERWORK:
Sweet, glorious relief! Not a lesson plan in sight!
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4. Packed lunches:
No more eating out of plastic containers. You now have the luxury of eating things that haven't been sitting in the staffroom fridge all morning.
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5. Making ridiculous threats like this:
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6. Remembering (or caring about) what day it is:
In your own little bubble, it doesn't matter!
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7. Styling your clothes, hair or make-up in a child-friendly way. 
Go on, dye your hair green, lash on the eyeliner and get those legs out!
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8. Having friends with any other profession:
Naturally, you'll get a lot of stick for having no work for weeks on end while your (once) friends slave away. 
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9. Staying in on weeknights:
No more, "Oh I can't stay up past 11pm or I won't have any energy for my class." 
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10. Accidentally speaking to other adults as if they're children:
Once you're out of teacher-mode, it's much easier to avoid a big fake, "Wooowwwww!" when a friend says something mildly interesting to you. You're sure to notice a decline in how patronising you can be as you gradually get used to adult company.

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